Letter to Dr Paul Katz, Psychiatrist and Associate Professor.

JE SUIS GARTH!

Dear Dr Katz,

When the heat was on, you snapped into action.You have the makings of a future C.E.O. 

Maybe you do have aspirations for the top job at Box Hill Hospital. I note your online presence is fading fast though, a rare move for a man on the move. With such an illustrious career such as yours, you should be flaunting you association with the American Psychiatric Association, and your other achievements.

Did you know Members of the Psychiatric Association are pushing to join the F.D.A. panel that approves psychiatric drugs, straddling between the interests of drug companies and themselves? Like any good business model, the association would have one eye on the stakeholders and one eye on the benefits to psychiatrist members. Consumers; where they fit in? It’s the question without an answer.

Now the USA Psychiatric Association is pushing the F.D.A. for electric shock treatment for children. What foresight!.....I had a great thought to help….. Why not install a treatment room in every school, and train up a teach to press the button that says...Zap! Whenever the students won’t cooperate, teachers could send them off to the Zap room, like they are treated at Box Hill Hospital. We must have sympathy for the frayed nerves of those hard working teachers. 

They deserve a break. The school could even provide the same service for teachers who can't cope with unruly children. There could be another recovery for next door to the children. They could get one of the children to pop in and see if they are alright. If any of them are slumped over they should tell reception. 

There’s no need for the supervision of a neurologist in the hospitals with this treatment. If a scarcely trained psychiatrist with next to nil neurology or electronics training can do it, why not train teachers to zap their students on their break. Especially, this would be brilliant for kids who don’t see eye to eye with the teacher. It should also work on the kids who cry too much in hospital. Then you could cut nursing staff, and save money for the stakeholders…..The possibilities are endless. ….. I think I should be your consultant. I've got lots of good ideas like this.  

Just between you and me the little ones will learn their lesson fast …to not mess with teachers. They’ll sit quietly in the corner for weeks. Maybe schools can have a dedicated recovery room with dark curtains so the other students don’t know what’s coming for them. We don’t want to scare them too early, do we Dr Katz?

E,C.T. early is good training for their future adult life in mental institutions, after electric shock treatment as children. Look what happened with Ritalin treatment for hyperactive children, lauded at the time by a noisy band of psychiatrists. How did their predictions of success pan out. Drug companies and psychiatrists made a killing. Now those kids are adults, they're filling the jails and mental institution at a mighty rate. You must say, that is very neat…. E.C.T. treatment that is self-perpetuating; and lucrative beyond your wildest dreams. It's much better for psychiatrists than pills, and most of it going into the pockets of psychiatrists. ...Teachers can do a deal at half price. Wow! ….The American Psychiatric Association will love you for your promotion..

The possibility of brain damage... what do you think? …. Well, treatment sometimes has its side effects, but it may not show up for twenty years when people like you are retired. If you need any more tips, just give me a call. 

You are the unofficial Guru of Electric Shock Treatment at Box Hill Hospital. We see that. No doubt you are still following the Garth Daniels case; you oversaw under your care,......until things started going wrong.

When everything began to tank, you quickly moved him to someone else’s patch; a guy in charge at Dandenong Hospital called Andrew Cidoni. Poor Andrew, what did he ever do to deserve this? He’s not handling the treatment well either. Your treatment to reduce depression has created it. The family sees it, his friends too. But this is not the disability field, although Garth has a disability. ……Magically in Victoria, a disabled person who develops a mental illness drops off the radar. ….. They become invisible. 

You set Garth Daniels Electric Shock Treatment off and running. Garth Daniel’s brain is degrading fast, one shock at a time. Ninety eight treatments and counting. The family is told there are only a few more. Is that true Dr Katz, or are staff stringing Garth along? His previously sunny disposition is turning to despair. Neither his family nor Garth knows what to expect. next 

You, Dr Katz. you  took Garth and incarcerated him in a bed, restrained and terrified by the wrists, scarring him, he was assaulted along the way, breaking his arm. All this restraint was for the convenience of staff, for sixty nine days while you experimented on him. There is a protocol for experimentation on patients, you know. You banned his family from seeing him so they wouldn't know. They are still banned from Dandenong Hospital too. Can you expand your attention to understand why they are prepared to take desperate measures?  If Garth didn’t have depression and be scarred by trauma before, he would have them now. While not having enough staff to supervise, Electric shock Treatment works as a great sedater. I wonder what you did with the other guy in the scuffle Dr Katz. It makes me shiver. ……Maybe its better I don’t know.

  

When you think about it, this is the perfect therapy. While treating one problem, it creates a further string of problems that need ECT treatment to fix them - for ever. - There is no mandated upper limit on shocks - This would be paradise for Frankinstein, the man who created his monster. 

There is one problem I see though; Australian cities are running out of cemetery plots…. I don’t know what we can do Paul. You know, with all those children coming up now the future for cemetery planners is bleak.  I’ve got it ……..we can find out where veterinaries dispose of dead cats and dogs and maybe get a cheap deal. You can send all of them out of town in bulk lots.

Then, you can have a batch of condolence cards made up for the families of the deceased, telling them they will have to go way out east to find the funeral pyre of their loved one. They can get directions from reception. There is a box of tissues on the desk, the first one is free.

Did you know you are one of a most privileged class? If you were in the disability field and did what you do to patients, you would be strung up by the scrotum.  ……..But we forget, this is mental health. 

Mental Health Minister Foley doesn’t care, so why would you? It's open slather. I know it. I nearly forgot; you must consider the stake holders first if you want to make it in this race. Consumers are a distraction. 

This experiment is still your baby Dr Katz; it seems it will be your legacy for all time. I’m happy to let you know how it’s going, with regular updates if you like. With your cosying up to the American Psychiatric association, that is pushing the F.D.A. to promote electric shock treatment for people with mental illness, including children, the stake holders should make a killing in dollars for hospitals and psychiatrists. 

Up to $1,000 for three seconds work, by anyone’s standards that’s good pay.

So, there you have it Dr Katz; I’ve tied up all your problems for you.

While we are at it, please give my regards to Dr Cidoni at Dandenong Hospital. I feel sorry for the poor man. What did he ever do to you to inherit your problems? 

Tell all this to Garth Daniels when you see him next time. Both of you will have a lot to talk about, won't you. You are going to visit him at Dandenong hospital aren’t you?  Don’t forget to take roses, they should cheer him up no end.